Peter's observations on Mumbai: It is not good medical and psychological advise to go to Mumbai after 3 weeks of sitting on a beach. The words "building codes" and "India" do not exist in the same document. Yes, it is possible for 4 grown men to ride on a highway on a Vespa. "Hello, friend!" translated into Hindi Vendor lingo is "give me your wallet!". Indian toilet paper is what we westerners call steel wool. The 4 Indian Food groups are: fried vegetables, fried fish, fried cheese, fried...something that I'm still trying to figure what it is. Cows do not make good house pets. Never, I repeat NEVER, give a homeless person in Mumbai food instead of money. I almost got into a throw-down with an entire family because I offered them 4 large bags of vegetables and fresh bread. Those of you who have never been to Mumbai can take great comfort in the fact that you know just as much about the city's geography as any taxi driver here. Most of us think we've seen poverty...spend 3 days in Mumbai and you'll rethink your definition. Honking your car horn in India means one of the following: 1 Get out of my way insolent westerner! 2 My lovely western friend, would you like a ride? 3 Damn...I forgot to get carrots! 4 Hey, look at that foxy cow! 5 I shall honk my favorite song for all to appreciate! 6 You bare a striking resemblance to my third cousin's Uncle Kumar from Delhi. Question: how come the bathrooms on Indian trains, which among all the world's railways should be among the most disgusting, are cleaner than the Metro North train bathrooms that carry a daily plethora of starched white-collar commuters to Wall Street in New York City? I am thoroughly convinced that the electrician who retrofitted our hotel for power was closely related to MacGuyver. I keep telling Helen that it is proper for her to walk 5 paces behind me...she refuses indignantly. I'm also trying to convince her that the fact that the street vendors ask me what she should wear is right and just. (ps> these were written after I warmed up to Mumbai) |